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Sexual Intelligence® Blog: Latest Posts

WRAP Week: Their Mission is Lying About Porn

Every year, the White Ribbon Against Pornography (WRAP) week mobilizes America’s community leaders, religious figures, and politicians. Their goal is to spread lies and hysteria about the dangers of adult pornography, and its alleged connections with sex trafficking, domestic violence, and child exploitation.

I have written about this cynical, shameful project many times: (https://goo.gl/fYS2KE; https://goo.gl/4juJRQ; https://goo.gl/HHkHKo). This year…

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I’m Tired of (Some) Erections

I’m tired of erections. Well, not all erections.

I’m tired of the erections that people think are so meaningful when they don’t get them. As in, “I don’t get erections, so there’s something wrong with me.” Or “He doesn’t get erections, which means he doesn’t care for me.”

Don’t get me wrong, I’m sympathetic about people’s concerns. But…

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Is There A Universal Sexual Desire?

I was on a podcast yesterday when the interviewer (call her Claire) said something like “Well, of course everyone wants to feel connected during sex.”

“No,” I replied. “Well, no grownup really wants sex to be like, just two bodies hammering away at each other.” Again I disagreed: “Sometimes grownups do,” I said.

She was both exasperated and curious. “Well, if connection isn’t the universal thing people want from sex, what is?” “There isn’t a universal thing that everyone wants from sex,” I said. She…

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