Monica Lewinsky—25 Years Later, Still Shouting “Victim!”

These days, the profession of psychology—mirroring American society—is quite focused on narratives of victimhood, exploitation, and trauma.

It’s disconcerting to hear patients describe themselves—per some blogger or their previous therapist—as struggling with “PTSD” from an event or situation that simply reflects the most aggravating part of adult life.

Going against the grain, I talk to these patients about their narratives of powerlessness, their difficulty grasping their own agency, and the inevitable way they blame others—parents, spouses, children, marriage, the “patriarchy”—for their inability to control their own lives.

They don’t always, shall we say, appreciate this.

That’s the reason to notice Monica Lewinsky’s latest public gig, a podcast. Launched two weeks ago, “Reclaiming with Monica Lewinsky” says it’s about “how she found the strength to take back her story after the scandal that turned her life upside down.”

“Join me,” she implores us, “as I continue to find my public voice…interviewing all kinds of people…about what it means to reclaim what’s been lost or taken in the broadest sense…like say, surviving a global scandal at 24 years old…”

Oh Monica, you’re still trying to survive. You’ve received millions of dollars, a TED talk, dozens of national of TV appearances, multiple corporate gigs—all because you slept with the President and blabbed to an untrustworthy “friend” about it. For a quarter-century, you’ve been complaining that people paid attention and judged you for this—while cashing the checks and keeping your name in the national consciousness.

Would anyone know Lewinsky if she hadn’t had oral sex with Bill Clinton? Or if she had shrugged off the whole thing when it blew up?

And get this—while pitching her podcast on NBC News last week (an opportunity every other podcaster would kill to have), she said that Clinton should have resigned after the affair went public. My, aren’t WE important!

This is the problem with simplistic narratives of exploitation and victimhood. Yes, Clinton was 27 years older than Lewinsky. But she writes that “although the affair was consensual…the relationship constituted an “abuse of power” on Clinton’s part.

An adult can’t expect to have it both ways—access to power, but protection from it. Being respected as an adult (and given adult responsibility), but protected from her own agency. Claiming the right to unrestricted sexual expression, while demanding acceptance for her sexual decisions.

In an era of social media, when everyone is a publisher and broadcaster, questions of responsibility, agency, and narratives are more important than ever. Virtual Reality and AI are cranking up the heat on these issues even more. Everyone wants protection from their own decision-making, both the predictable consequences and the unexpected ones. People love the concept of addiction for that reason. Similarly, calling a sexual preference a sexual orientation or identity oversimplifies issues of responsibility and agency: “I can’t help it, that’s just who I am.”

These cultural challenges were well underway before Clinton unzipped with his young lover. But in 2025, seeing Lewinsky as a victim, or feminist hero, or model of sexual freedom, or triumphant survivor, diminishes every one of those categories—and makes us all a little bit less likely to take responsibility for our actions or our perceived powerlessness.
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For my 2020 post on how reactions to the Clinton-Lewinsky affair exposed some troubling fault-lines in feminist thinking, see https://www.martyklein.com/linda-tripp-not-a-whistleblower/
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