Q: Is it normal if a man uses a pillow or sheets for masturbation? According to The Kinsey Report, male masturbation is largely manual, though it also mentions stimulation of the penis against some objects. What masturbatory techniques are better for men: manual or friction against objects?

Dr. Klein: You wonder about “normal” and “healthy” masturbation. Within certain limits, whatever makes your penis feel good is acceptable. What are those limits? 1) consent: if you are with a person, has s/he given permission? If you are doing something someone else observes, has s/he given permission? You don’t want to force yourself on someone else. 2) responsible: are you taking responsibility for the consequences of your behavior? For example, it may feel good to masturbate while driving, but this could be very dangerous, and so a person should not do this. 3) safety: are you doing anything that can hurt you? Some people masturbate 5 or 6 times a day, until their penis is very sore and even bleeding. This isn’t good, just like it isn’t good to do other, non-sexual activities that result in physical harm.

Using these criteria, I would say that masturbating with a pillow, ladies’ panties, vibrator, soft fruit, etc. is fine. True, the majority of people don’t use such objects, but so what? As long as it works for you and doesn’t hurt anyone else, it doesn’t matter how rare your practice is. Why don’t people who do use such objects talk about them? Because, like you, they fear they are weird and that people will make fun of them.