Sex without intercourse

Q: My girlfriend and I have great oral sex every weekend, but she won’t have intercourse. She says she fears pregnancy and that I’ll lose respect for her. How can I convince her to do it?

Dr. Klein: The question is not how but why. You say you’re already having great sex together, and you’ve obviously talked about this many times. Her reasoning may not match yours, but she has made her feelings very clear. Why pressure her to do something she doesn’t want to do? Continue enjoying what you have, and let her know how much you enjoy it. If this show of respect eventually helps her desire intercourse, that’s great. Otherwise, take pride in the respectful way you’ll be treating her.

CLOSE

Sign up for more

Sexual Intelligence®

More insights about better sex

More from the Sex Therapist’s Couch

More sexual politics

More about

desire, PornPanic, sexual health, infidelity, sex & aging,

and how technology is changing sex

Subscribe to my Sexual Intelligence blog, and I’ll send you, FREE:

* my new e-book, Bedroom Blues, Therapist Wisdom.

* a 10% discount on all books & audios in my store.

CLOSE

Thank you for signing up!