‘low desire’

Saying “No” Does NOT Equal “Low Desire”

One of the most common problems people come to see me about?

“I have low desire.”
“He has low desire.”
“She has low desire.”

In response, I ask lots of questions. We talk. And at least half the time, I surprise people: “I don’t think this is a desire issue.”

Saying no to something when you don’t expect to enjoy it isn’t a “problem,” it’s common sense.

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Is Lousy Sex Better Than No Sex?

It depends on what you want from sex. If you mostly want an orgasm, lousy sex might do the trick. If you mostly want to have someone agreeing to have sex with you whether they really want to or not, lousy sex may be your best bet. If you mostly just want to see someone naked, or briefly feel a tit or some balls in your hand, lousy sex may be good enough. But most men and women want other stuff from sex. Maybe you do, too. For example, you may want to see your partner smile with pleasure. You…

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