‘sex addiction’

Cheated On? Here’s The WORST 5 Things You Can Do

Every week, I counsel men and women heartbroken over infidelity.

And every week, I try to prevent those people from making big mistakes. If it’s already too late, I help people deal with the consequences of their big mistakes.

Frequently, nearly everyone in the Betrayed’s life is encouraging them to make big mistakes. That can even include their therapist. It most certainly includes the internet and social media.

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Myths About Infidelity

Every single week for the last 42 years I have spoken with one or more clients who have cheated or been cheated on.

Survey data regarding cheating keeps changing as social definitions of cheating evolve. And the invention of cars, telephones, and the internet—not to mention mixed-gender schools and workplaces—have multiplied people’s opportunities for a broader range of physical and emotional relationships.

I do believe I’ve heard every possible reason for infidelity, and…

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Another Marriage Destroyed By “Sex Addiction” Treatment

“Sex addiction” treatment understands nothing about sex, lets one or both partners evade responsibility, and assumes “addicts” are out of control.

Its handling of infidelity, porn use, sex workers, “emotional affairs,” desire, fantasy, and masturbation damages people and their marriages.

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National Psychotherapy Day: What Shrinks Get Wrong About Sex

Today is National Psychotherapy Day. Every year, it comes seven weeks after National Psychic Day (yes, really).

Psychotherapy involves a wonderful set of tools. Every year, skillful therapists save marriages, facilitate divorces, educate parents, ease trauma, and help people overcome depression or anxiety.

But one of American psychotherapy’s main weaknesses is in the area of sexuality. Most therapists…

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Why There’s No Such Thing As Sex Addiction—and Why It Matters

Sex addiction is a convenient explanation for the destructive behavior of people driven mad by shame and Christian demands for sexual purity.

But the problem is shame, not sex. Treating shame, sexual ignorance, and relationship problems can actually cure people–so they don’t have to be addicts in recovery for the rest of their lives.

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