I’ve lived through a lot of serious change in my lifetime: microwave ovens, smartphones & social media, the interstate highway system, the internet, the invention of frozen yogurt.
Sexuality, however, is still more or less the same: what people want, what people fear, what people can’t talk about, what people don’t understand about their bodies.
A recent New York Times piece interviewed sex therapists (no, not me, but several of my highly respected friends), asking…
People talk about their “Love Languages” the way they talk about their eye color or foot size–“That’s just who I am, there’s nothing I can do about it, and you’ll just have to adapt to it.”
When anyone says “This is just who I am” instead of “This is what i prefer,” the relationship is headed for…
Despite the extraordinary amount of good information that’s available, the number of people who are sexually frustrated, disappointed, confused, anxious, or clueless hasn’t declined. In fact, young people today have less sex than young people did 10, 20, or 30 years ago.
The reasons include the usual suspects: selecting an incompatible partner; religious & cultural beliefs that sexual desire is dangerous; poor communication skills; insecurity about desires, fantasies, or one’s body.
But today there’s another culprit undermining sexual desire and satisfaction: social media.
Millions of couples argue about porn.
The arguments sound like they’re about porn, but they really aren’t.
The conflict almost invariably involves a woman who’s unhappy with a man’s porn-viewing, while the man defends himself or criticizes the woman’s unhappiness. Couples can argue about porn for hours, over months and years, and easily avoid talking about what’s really bothering them.
The arguments typically sound like this: “I don’t want you looking at porn because…
Sex therapy, first developed by Masters & Johnson in the early 1960s, can be wonderful—life-changing, cost-effective, marriage- (and therefore family-) saving.
But we can’t do everything that people want or need. Here are some things I’m asked to do periodically, which I just don’t know how to do—and I doubt that my colleagues, can, either.
Sex therapy often gets great results.
What are the principles of sexual and relationship satisfaction that successful patients learn? Here are six of them, along with stories of couples & individuals who…